2007-10-08-6:38 p.m.

Good old Diaryland.

I'm not the man I once was. Physically, mentally, emotionally, psychologically. I wish people who know me now could've known me 20-25 years ago. They would understand so much better. I used to write my heart, now I don't even know what to write. My fatigue and uncertainty, my insecurity and invisibility has turned me into a shadow walking between reality and muddled minded sub-reality.
A reality that exists, but all at once. Every problem, every dream, every issue, thought, task, job, love, joke, word, song... all in my head, all at once, all disjointed, unassociated, in my spinning head, all while I walk invisibly through my day.
I'm too tired, too much.

If I could, I'd go back 20-25 years and re-write this, with real words, real emotion, real thought. The real me.

d.